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Desperate to feel whole

  • Reason: Cosmetic
  • Current Cup Size: B
  • Desired Cup Size: D
  • Body Type: Slim / Slender
  • Ethnicity: Latino / Hispanic
  • State / Region: California
  • Country: United States
  • Listed: September 12, 2018 1:00 pm
  • Expires: 55 days, 8 hours
20180901_222847

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Description

It’s frustrating for me during the body-positive movement. I’m not a very big person, only 5’ on a tall day.Im very petite. tiny waist and tiny tiny boobies. I’m talking like full B cup sometimes a C . Weighed as little as 108lbs in my early 20’s (that’s a long story for another time) otherwise stabilized at a healthy 126lbs LITTLE. And, REALLY small boobs. And, it always bothered me. I’d never fill out the tops of dresses. I felt feeble, sickly, and fucking annoyed by people always calling me skinny. We’re busy being proud of big beautiful women, and chastising petite women.

The thing with being female, and being small, bras never fit me well. Which sucks so hard. A part of your body that is supposed to be sexy and inspire confidence is underdeveloped and akin to a little deflated, saggy plum or some shit. I’d buy a bra thinking it fit well, get sized and measured and everything (horrific for me – bra shopping is the worst), then a couple of wears and the little cups would pull away from my skin exposing my little nipples to literally everyone. Just, uhg, not fun to even reminisce about.

IT GAVE ME FEELINGS OF INFERIORITY, AND I FELT THAT I LACKED FEMININITY.
Which is a horrible feeling for women in general, never mind a woman in the automotive industry. I know what you’re thinking: embrace it girl! That’s who you are. Yeah, I know. I KNOW. But, I knew that was what people were staring at when they saw pictures of me “whoa she has small boobs”. I was perceived as younger, less womanly, yada yada. It sucked, and it consumed my working life, and I was convinced it was impacting how I advanced in my career. If it wasn’t physically, it was emotionally (or subconsciously, if you’re into that).

Then of course after giving birth to my amazing children,vwell we all know what happens then . Not only are my breast shrivled of prunes but now my stomach is an issue that has really affected me mentally.

I WAS PARALYZED BY MY LACK OF CONFIDENCE.

Then the most embarrassing moment in my life was when after being single for a while i go on my first date in a very long time. I was feeling good, sexy, my boobs i was not going to let them ruin my date. And well it was a really nice , romantic evening and yes ladies i hadnt got any in a very long time so one thing led to another. I was so in the moment that i forgot to remove this huge padded bra. When he removed my ever so huge bra he looked at my chest with discust. I wanted to break down and cry. He said wow that a big padded bra. I didnt know what to say , so i acted as normal as i could acting as if it didnt bother me. But when he went to suck on them he was trying to figure out how to grab it. I hated myself my body i was this monster. He told me that i was a nice, cool chick but he just needed to be wirh someone that had bigger breast. I just hung up on him, and cried for hours.

Im very specific with respect to the look I wanted. It was critical to me to look natural. I wanted a natural bounce, a natural shape, and a natural feel. I wanted people to not believe me when I tell them they’re fake.

So this is my shame, my embarrassment, what makes me feel less of a woman.

Listing ID: 4585b970af91222c

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